Wednesday, December 25, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Epilogue


Now that Chronicles of Christmas is finished, it’s time for the special epilogue episode. If you have been reading for the past fifteen days, you’ll know the story, but if not, please check out the full tale (click on the “Stories” button under the blog’s title and slogan, click “STAR WARS,” and then click “Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas”). Anyway, today’s episode is what I will be doing from now on when I have finished a story: An epilogue episode just to leave it hanging for the next story. I recommend that if you want to get the full idea of this episode, search for my posts “Character Profile: Darth Fandom” and “Character Profile: Darth Saidgge.” These two posts will give you a basic idea of what’s happening and what’s going to happen. So, why am I holding you? Go read the story! Just to catch you up though, here’s what happened in yesterday’s episode:

SANTOR:       Who are you?
FANDOM:       Master, you’re alive!
SAIDGGE:      It’s the moment you’ve been waiting for.
SANTOR:       You’ve been a good friend. Goodbye.
SAIDGGE:      Holy.... Look over here.
FANDOM:       I have a bad feeling about this....

Now how about you read this paragraph to finish the Christmas tale:

Unknown Imperial Star Destroyer, Hyperspace, 17 BBY

   “He’s come aboard.” A large crowd of Imperial officers and navy cadets walked around the bridge of an Imperial Star Destroyer. “Prepare....” One of the Imperial officers questioned the previous statement, “Prepare what?” Just after saying these words, a tall, dark and black-cloaked figure stepped into the control room. All the cadets and officers stood to the side and saluted him. One of the officers, who was looking out of the main window, turned around to see the figure. “Lord Vader.” There was no response, just deep, hard breathing through a dark, black helmet. “We have obtained the map of the location, as you requested. We neutralized the trader before any information was spread.” “Are the coordinates of the planet in place?” “There was a rough location implanted on the map. For now, we are proceeding according to plan.” Although unseen to any of the other crew on the Star Destroyer, Vader smiled. “I am putting you and your fellow archaeologists under the protection of the 53rd Elite Brigade. They will bring you grave protection from any incoming threats.” “Of course, Lord Vader. We have also obtained some additional information.” “What might this include?” “There was a battle between the Republic and the inhabitants about four years ago. Since then, the planet has been deserted, and according to our top scientists, this would mean that the specific planet is now covered in molten lava over the period that has passed.” “History is history, Chief Officer Gor Mantis. Either way, it is an archaeologist’s job to explore and discover inconclusive facts about our past, am I incorrect?” “No, my Lord. I will do as you say.” Vader walked towards the window, forcing Mantis to step out of the way. “Your research has been reasonably good recently. Do not fail like your father did. It would not turn out well.” “I will not live up to my father’s shadow.” “Good. Proceed with your plan.” Vader then turned around and faced the door. He walked towards two stormtroopers who stood next to him, and then followed them out of the room. The door closed behind the three. “Are the coordinates set?” “Yes.” “Good. The Emperor will be pleased with our progress.”

Now that this episode is over, I just want to go through some things that might be a little weird. First of all, Chief Officer Gor Mantis is a character that Darth Saidgge created. He’s an Imperial archaeologist, and he is absolutely loyal to the Empire. If you have not read any of my previous posts, you probably won’t know that in October I was going to start a magazine, but that’s been delayed, so if you do follow my blog via e-mail, you’ll be able to access some exclusive content that almost made it into the magazine. Saidgge also wrote a short report by Mantis which will be accessible if you subscribe. Anyway, I hope you’re pumped for the next story. I won’t be posting it just yet, but I will be pretty soon. In the meantime, while I work on the PDF of Chronicles of Christmas, I will be writing some of the stories, which will probably (when I eventually start posting them) appear monthly, paragraph-by-paragraph. I do already have over a year’s worth of Star Wars: Chronicles of Telian Aieler: The Clone Wars and about five months’ worth of original sci-fi stories. I’ve also just received an opening crawl video for Chronicles of Telian Aieler: The Clone Wars from Kassel Labs’ Star Wars Intro Creator, and I’ll be posting that soon enough. Well, that’s a wrap for the decade (I guess) on THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM!

Tuesday, December 24, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 15


A suspicious new arrival is now in the Toy Factory. Who is he? If you want to know the answer to this question, you will have to read the 15th one-and-half-sized Christmas Eve Special instalment to Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! Just to catch you up, here’s what happened in yesterday’s episode:

SANTOR:       Wakey, wakey, little Force user.
SANTOR:       I call it the Electro!
FANDOM:       My master never told me.
SANTOR:       Your fault, child.
SANTOR:       I call it the Armageddon. You’ll like the company.
UNKNOWN:   I’m back.

Now, if you like what you just read, how about you read the 15th part:

Weapons Master’s Toy Factory, Polle I, 17 BBY

   “Who are you?” Santor lifted himself up from the ground that he had been pushed onto, and stared at this man in awe. “Master!” Fandom shouted when he saw the figure appear. “I thought that the child was the only one alive....” “Not for long.” Saidgge lifted his right arm and twisted it around, which released Fandom from Santor’s Electro. “You know why I call them Elves? They follow my orders! Attack!” All the rest of the people in the room each picked up blasters and aimed directly at Fandom and Saidgge, blaster mode set to rapid fire. “Don’t let any of them live!” Saidgge pulled out his lightsaber from his waist and began to deflect the Elves’ blasts. Watching the scene in horror, Santor stood up and ran for the exit behind him. “Master, over here!” Fandom demanded. The Sith’s Master chucked his lightsaber at his apprentice, who threw the weapon at the exit, killing some Elves in the process. The lightsaber then levitated itself back to Fandom, almost like a boomerang, who threw it back to its owner. The lightsaber’s slice had corroded the door’s holopanel systems, which made the door unable to open. “Blast!” Santor mumbled to himself. He thought about what he had just said, and then he had an idea. Picking up one of the Armageddon bazookas from one of his weapons displays, he aimed at the door, and with one blast, the melting heat burnt through the steel door. “Fandom,” Darth Saidgge whispered, “it’s the moment you’ve been waiting for.” “Yes!” Fandom ran towards his master, who, using his expertise skills with the Force, launched him towards the roof. As he reached the top of the building, Fandom looked down at the Elves and unleashed his greatest power ever, electrocuting and killing all of them with his sheer power. Falling from the sky, Fandom was caught by his master. “Quickly, we’ve got to get Santor!” The two Sith ran after Santor’s silhouette, and when they finally reached him, he dropped his gun. “Ho ho ho! If you think that you have stopped me, then I think you should have a bet over some Bantha milk about whether you’ll beat my two bodyguards or not!” Out of the shadows, two extremely tall and incredibly well-built men appeared. “They are Comet and Dancer, and you have just met your match!” A door closed in front of Santor, and he was gone. “Well, tough guys, let’s see what you’re like.” The first man, Comet, ran towards Fandom, who simply stood there doing absolutely nothing. About to knock the lights out of Fandom, Comet was halted by Saidgge and then thrown into the roof. He fell unconsciously to the ground, and was finished off when the various boxes fell onto his torso. Dancer, the other man, opened the door and attempted to escape, but was stopped when Fandom pulled the door closed and sliced Dancer’s head off. “You just jammed the door! How are we supposed to get Santor now?” Santor, who was now on the roof, leaped into his 2-254 Customized Combat Sleigh. “Rudolf, is the cargo prepared?” “Yes, sir.” The sleigh began to lift off, and Santor pointed his blaster at Rudolf. “You’ve been a good friend.” He shot. Hearing the sleigh’s departure, Saidgge screamed, “He’s getting away!” Santor pulled out some sort of controller, which read Self-Destruct, meaning “Self-Destruct.” “Goodbye,” he murmured. BOOM! There was a huge explosion. “What was that?” Fandom asked curiously. Saidgge peeped through one of the windows, and eyed out the bounty hunter. “Holy....” “What is it?” “Look over here.” Staring out the window, the two watched the bounty hunter wave at them. “I have a bad feeling about this....”

The story is over. Santor is dead, along with all of his operations and scheming alliances. But that doesn’t mean that the Chronicles of Telian Aieler are over! Tomorrow, be here for the final instalment, the epilogue that will define the story and lead into the rest of the everlasting saga of Telian Aieler, for tomorrow will be the special Christmas Day episode, which will act as a prelude to Star Wars: Chronicles of Telian Aieler – The Dark Times! In the meantime, while Saidgge and I create the PDF Edition of this epic tale of the Star Wars take on Christmas, I will also carry on writing my Star Wars fan-fic, along with The Second Imperium Trilogy and its official companion guide. I have also been thinking about creating a Marvel Cinematic Universe blog, collecting all sorts of comics, stories, clips, and various other things, but that’s just an idea. Anyway, if you want to check out the full story so far (by tomorrow, you’ll be able to read the entire story), you can explore my Star Wars Zone (find it via the “Stories” page below the blog’s title and slogan), and you’ll probably find the story there (unless somebody has hacked my blog, although I doubt that would happen). Well that’s a wrap for today on THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM!

Monday, December 23, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 14


Fandom is now in the captivity of Santor Claws, also known as the Weapons Master. What will happen next? If you want to know the answer to this question, you will have to read the 14th instalment to Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! Just to catch you up, here’s what happened in yesterday’s episode:

FANDOM:       Who are you and where am I?
SANTOR:       Ho ho ho! I am the great and almighty Santor!
SANTOR:       My friends call me Santor Claws.
FANDOM:       I’d like to know why I’m here.
SANTOR:       The bounty hunter was here to assassinate me
SANTOR:       Leave him. Prepare the cargo.

Now, if you like what you just read, how about you read the 14th part:

Weapons Master’s Toy Factory, Polle I, 17 BBY

   “Wakey, wakey, little Force user.” A large amount of some sort of strange liquid was poured onto the face of the young and presumably soon-to-be-killed-by-a-fat-man-who-calls-weapons-toys Sith Lord, Darth Fandom. He woke up, and looked at his hands, realising that he was stuck on the same golden table that he was on earlier before he was tased by his new enemy, the one also known as the Weapons Master, Santor Claws. This time, though, he couldn’t just simply release himself from the table using the Force, since the table had been rigged with electrics that flickered on with a reasonably large amount of movement from anybody who lay on the table. He tried to move, but he was electrocuted. “Wow, you thought that I would let you go that easily? It’s my newest invention, and I call it the Electro! I must say, it is quite shocking. Now, in order for you to escape, you must answer these few questions that I have to ask, the first being one of the most unanswered questions of today: Why are you here?” “Why should I tell you the answer?” Suddenly, the table lit up and Fandom was electrocuted. “Why should I tell you that there is also a manual operating system to the Electro? Now, tell me why you are here.” “I don’t know. My master never told me.” The table let off an electric blast again. “Your master didn’t tell you? You have Force powers? Can’t you just read his mind or something?” “No, he’s dead, and you killed him.” “Your fault, child.” The table shocked Fandom again. “It seems that I have to remind you that the bounty hunter who killed your master was not one of mine. He was here on a mission from Jabba the Hutt to kill me, but you interfered with his business. I am quite appreciative that you gave my ‘Elves’ time to find him, but you too have now messed up my plans.” “I think that I have a choice here.” “And what might that be?” “I tell you, then kill you, or I just kill you straight away.” “I think I’ll be doing the killing here.” FZZT! Fandom was beginning to get annoyed with the Electro. “I think that you should meet my personal favourite of my creations. I call it the Armageddon.” Santor pulled out a large bazooka-styled weapon from the ground. “You’ll enjoy the company.” Santor was about to shoot when there was a sudden split-second and Santor ended at the other side of the room. “I’m back.”

Will Santor wreak any more havoc? Will the Elves attack? Who is the saviour of Darth Fandom? If your mind is spinning so much that you want to know, then don’t forget to be here tomorrow for the Final Showdown between Santor and Darth Fandom in tomorrow’s Christmas Eve Special of Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! If you want to check out the full story so far, you can explore my Star Wars Zone (find it via the “Stories” page below the blog’s title and slogan), and you’ll probably find the story there. Well that’s a wrap for today on THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM!

Sunday, December 22, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 13


The young Darth Fandom had been captured by a group of unknown men. Who are they working for? If you want to know the answer to this question, you will have to read the 13th instalment to Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! Just to catch you up, here’s what happened in yesterday’s episode:

EARPIECE:    Are you sure it’s him?
TALL MAN 1:  Thick black hair, oversized fur coat....
EARPIECE:    That’s him.
TALL MAN 2:  What are our orders?
TALL MAN 1:  Bag him.
TALL MAN 1:  I wonder why you’re here.

Now, if you like what you just read, how about you read the 13th part:

Unknown Location, Polle I, 17 BBY

   “Wake up, Jedi scum!” Darth Fandom lay on a large gold table that he had no idea where it had come from. “Where.... am I?” Fandom looked around the location, absolutely astonished by his surroundings. “Do you not know where you are? Ho ho ho! I thought that this location was the only reason that anybody or anything would visit this dreaded Polle system!” Fandom shook his head while hooked onto the table. “Just tell me where I am!” “Well, since you do not know, I better tell you. You are at the amazing and astonishing Weapons Master’s Toy Factory, one of the greatest tourist attractions in the entire galaxy!” “Who are you and what do you want with me?” “You do not know me? I am staring to dislike you. I am the great and almighty Santor!” As these words were spoken, a great big bulging man with a reasonable height and a large weight stepped off of his throne and looked at Fandom. “If you haven’t noticed, my friends call me Santor Claws.” He pulled up his right hand, and pulled off a glove, revealing a metallic clawed hand with botched wires sticking out from each finger. “As for my Toy Factory, it is simply a cover up for my weapons. I am one of the greatest weapons manufacturing masterminds ever to set foot in this universe, and I am extremely surprised you’ve never heard of me.” Fandom twisted his wrists and pulled himself up from the chains that held him to the table. “I’d like to know why I’m here, Santor.” “I have come here with some questions for you, actually. I myself were wondering why you dared to tread he path of my holy ground.” “It’s a complex story, and it would have been much easier if your soldier hadn’t killed my mentor.” “You entertain me, young one. That ‘soldier’ was no more than a bounty hunter here to assassinate me, and he was in no way related to me. Now, please, go ahead and answer my question: Why are you here?” “If you’re so keen to know, why didn’t you just ask me in the first place? Either way, I don’t think I’m going to cooperate.” “Bad choice, young child.” Santor was about to pull out his stolen Imperial blaster when Fandom pulled it way out of his reach and shot two of Santor’s guards who were restraining him. About to escape Santor threw a taser at Fandom, which shocked him and made him collapse. “Leave him. Prepare the cargo.”

What is Santor’s larger conspiracy? Can Fandom escape Santor’s wrath? Will someone save him? If you are curious to know, then don’t forget to be here tomorrow for Part 15 of Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! If you want to check out the full story so far, you can explore my Star Wars Zone (find it via the “Stories” page below the blog’s title and slogan), and you’ll probably find the story there. Well that’s a wrap for today on THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM!

Saturday, December 21, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 12


The murderer of Fandom’s Sith Master Darth Saidgge, only known as the bounty hunter, has been killed. Who killed the bounty hunter? If you want to know the answer to this question, you will have to read the 12th instalment to Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! Just to catch you up, here’s what happened in yesterday’s episode:

FANDOM:       You.... won’t.... succeed....
HUNTER:       Succeed? You don’t know what “succeed” means!
HUNTER:       If you die, young Jedi, all the Jedi will be gone.
FANDOM:       I’m.... no.... Jedi!
HUNTER:       Poor, poor, Force-using freak, powerless and weak....
UNKNOWN:   Your Intel was right, boss. Caught him just in time.

Now, if you like what you just read, how about you read the 12th part:

Unknown Location, Polle I, 17 BBY

   “Are you sure *FZZT* it’s him?” A voice appeared over an earpiece that was placed in the left ear of a tall, skinny man. Although it seemed and sounded like the voice’s communication was being intercepted by some sort of unknown source, it was not, the earpiece was just simply very old and pretty much no longer in use. This specific earpiece also was not being manufactured by any companies anymore, and it was very rare to find someone nowadays who actually knew how to at least repair one of these pieces. “Thick black hair, oversized fur coat, too many weapons....” “That’s definitely him. *FZZT* See if you can *FZZT* find anything related to his *FZZT* identity. I’ll send you *FZZT* reinforcements.” The tall man bent down and looked at Fandom’s unconscious body. “There’s somebody else next to him. Quite tall, but looks quite young. Wearing some sort of robes.” The voice over the earpiece continued, “Tell the *FZZT* reinforcements to take *FZZT* him as well.” “Of course.” The conversation ended which the touch of a tiny red button in the centre of the earpiece. The tall man stopped observing the two bodies, and stood up to see many other men who looked strikingly similar to him approaching. “What are our orders?” “He told me that I need to tell you that he told me that you need to take the body over here.” The men looked at each other. “And which one might that be?” “The one that’s not dead.” “I’m confused here. Aren’t they both dead?” “They might be. If they are, then take the one that’s alive.” The men looked at the bounty hunter’s body. “Well, we might as well take this one.” “No, not that one,” the tall, skinny one exclaimed, “that one’s dead! Take the other one!” “As you wish.” The tall, skinny saw one of the other men holding a large bag. “You over there! Pass me that bag!” The man gave him the bag. The tall, skinny one then threw the bag on the floor. “Bag him.” “He’s not dead.” “Who said that he’s not dead?” “You did.” “Well, if I did say that, I take it back. Now bag him.” The man pulled a face of disinterest. “That’s an order!” While the men began stuffing Fandom’s body into the large bag, the tall, skinny one gazed at the bounty hunter’s body “I wonder why you’re here.”

Are there more conspirators in the murder of the bounty hunter? Who is the man on the earpiece? Is the weapons master watching? If you are curious to know, then don’t forget to be here tomorrow for Part 13 of Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! If you want to check out the full story so far, you can explore my Star Wars Zone (find it via the “Stories” page below the blog’s title and slogan), and you’ll probably find the story there. Well that’s a wrap for today on THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM!

Friday, December 20, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 11

Darth Saidgge is dead, Darth Fandom is powerless, and now the bounty hunter is capable of anything. Is this the end of the two Sith? If you want to know the answer to this question, you will have to read the 11th instalment to Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! Just to catch you up, here’s what happened in yesterday’s episode:

FANDOM:       Oh....
UNKNOWN:   Don’t worry, I can handle him.
UNKNOWN:   Tell me, and I might just let you live.
UNKNOWN:   I think you should try and do better next time.
UNKNOWN:   Wait, there won’t be a next time!
UNKNOWN:   I’ve got you now.

Now, if you like what you just read, how about you read the 11th part:

Unknown Location, Polle I, 17 BBY

   “Get.... away.... from.... me....” Lying dead still in the freezing cold snow that covered the once-grassy terrain, Darth Fandom lay in absolute paralysation with a large purple bruise across the side of his face, from his now black eye down to his chin. “You.... won’t.... succeed....” “Succeed? HA! I simply don’t think that you understand the definition of “succeed.” Let me explain it to you. Succeed is when something good happens to me, let’s say, I win, and you lose. That example is exactly what is happening now, and there’s nothing you can do about it.” The bounty hunter pulled his grappling hook from his pocket, the one that he had just used to manage to escape from the great pit of nothingness that Saidgge had died in. “You know, it had become an apparent fact to me that the Jedi had all been purged from the very fabric of our existence in this galaxy. Apparently that fact is all but an untrue lie, now that I’ve met you. Surely, though, there can't be many more like you out there, maybe even none at all, so if you die, young Jedi, they will all be gone.” Fandom sucked in his throat, as if it was his last breath, and muttered, “I’m.... no.... Jedi!” He ripped his hands out of the ground, and was about to create yet another show of Force, until the bounty hunter dropped his grappling gun onto Fandom’s light chest. The heavy grapple gun pushed deeply into Fandom’s skin and knocked him out instantly. “Poor, poor, Force-using freak, who appeared to be powerless and weak. When the bounty hunter came out to play, it seemed that the child’s limits had run away. But when the bounty hunter came out to strike, something happened that the child did not like. He killed his master, who deserved to die, and survived not, there I do not lie. The bounty hunter came for the child, and killed him like he was simply....” PEW! The bounty hunter looked at the young Darth Fandom, then he stared at his chest. As he stared, he saw his chest burning like lava from a just-erupted volcano. “Oh....” Before he could even attempt to finish that sentence, the bounty hunter fell dead onto the ground, next to the unconscious Fandom. Out of the distance, a tall, skinny man appeared out of the mist behind the scene. “Your intel was right, boss. Caught him just in time.”

Who killed the bounty hunter? Is Darth Fandom dead? Will the weapons master reveal himself to the young Sith? If you extremely keen to know, then don’t forget to be here tomorrow for Part 12 of Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! If you want to check out the full story so far, you can explore my Star Wars Zone (find it via the “Stories” page below the blog’s title and slogan), and you’ll probably find the story there. Well that’s a wrap for today on THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM!

Thursday, December 19, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 10


A bounty hunter, working for the one and only Jabba the Hutt, here to eliminate Saidgge and Fandom. Is this his true mission? If you want to know the answer to this question, you will have to read the 10th instalment to Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! Just to catch you up, here’s what happened in yesterday’s episode:

SAIDGGE:      Don’t do it, my apprentice.
FANDOM:       Don’t worry, I can handle him.
UNKNOWN:   Tell me, and I might just let you live.
SAIDGGE:      I came here to eliminate you. Fett took your place.
UNKNOWN:   LIAR! You came here for the weapons master, did you not?
UNKNOWN:   This is your end.

Now, if you like what you just read, how about you read the 10th part:

Unknown Location, Polle I, 17 BBY

   “Oh....” What had just happened in this strange and extremely fast moment? All that Darth Fandom could remember was the graze to his arm, and then.... Where was Master Saidgge? He looked up for a moment, and saw Saidgge attempting to fight his way out of the grip of the new bounty hunter opponent, who was strangling Saidgge to absolute nothingness with his bare hands. As Saidgge’s face grew white, the bounty hunter spoke, “This is your end.” Then, he threw him off the cliff. Saidgge’s body tumbled down the infinite hill until it was no longer able to be seen by the simple naked eye of the human being. Full of shock after the terrible experience that had just happened right in front of him, Darth Fandom pushed himself up and faced the bounty hunter, who was still looking far down into the abyss-like ditch. Staring at his Sith Master’s murderer, the young Sith eyed out a smoke canister on the bounty hunter’s waist, and, using his keen and capable Dark Side of the Force powers, squeezed the canister so tight that it burst open. This caused a dark cloud of smoke to surround the bounty hunter, who fell unconsciously to the ground. Now that the bounty hunter had been rid of, Fandom placed his hands in front of him and pulled up the hunter’s body using the Force. He tightened his grip on the enemy, and then chucked him down the same hole that had been the death cradle of Fandom’s Sith Master. Turning around, he walked away slowly and departed from the scene. OOF! Darth Fandom fell face first into the snow. “You think you can defeat me that easily, child? Well, I think you should try and do better next time.” Fandom listened carefully to these words in his head. He knew it was the bounty hunter, and that the only way he could have possibly survived was by using a grappling hook. He should have thought of that before he threw him off a cliff. “Well, I take back that last comment. You won’t be able to try better next time.... There won’t be a next time!” Fandom could feel the bounty hunter’s presence moving closer, so he rolled over to examine his thought. Instead of seeing the bounty hunter approaching, he saw the tip of the blaster pointed at his face. “I’ve got you now.”

Will Fandom die at the hands of the bounty hunter? Will he be saved in time? Are there others lurking in the shadows? If you are only here to know, then don’t forget to be here tomorrow for Part 11 of Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! If you want to check out the full story so far, you can explore my Star Wars Zone (find it via the “Stories” page below the blog’s title and slogan), and you’ll probably find the story there. Well that’s a wrap for today on THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM!

Wednesday, December 18, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 9


A bounty hunter, working for the one and only Jabba the Hutt, here to eliminate Saidgge and Fandom. Is this his true mission? If you want to know the answer to this question, you will have to read the 9th instalment to Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! Just to catch you up, here’s what happened in yesterday’s episode:

FANDOM:       Who are you?
UNKNOWN:   I think you know who I am.
FANDOM:       Why didn’t you tell me what was happening?
SAIDGGE:      I was afraid you might not come if you knew the truth.
UNKNOWN:   Your lightsaber won’t work on me here in North Polle.
FANDOM:       I guess we’ll just have to fight a different way.

Now, if you like what you just read, how about you read the 9th part:

Unknown Location, Polle I, 17 BBY

   “Don’t do it, my apprentice,” Darth Saidgge spoke to his angry apprentice. He stood in placed his right hand on his apprentice’s left shoulder and squeezed tight, but Darth Fandom knew no bounds, and pulled his master’s hand off. “Don’t worry, I can handle him.” Fandom shoved his hands together and opened them towards the HR-98 Combat Assault Rifle that was held in the hands of the mysterious bounty hunter. The Force push that shot out of Fandom’s hands heaved the bounty hunter and his weapon a considerably large amount backwards until the enemy fell into the snowy ground below his body. Darth Fandom smiled as he felt the presence of Darth Saidgge in absolute shock. He then reached his right arm out and pulled the bounty hunter’s blaster rifle into the grasp of his hand and crippled it as it came flying towards him. Walking further towards his enemy, Fandom pulled stacks of snow from the ground into a Force bubble around his hands, but was stopped when the bounty hunter pulled two simple BlasTech-manufactured blasters from his fur coat. He shot at his Sith opponent, with one blast barely missing Fandom’s left shoulder, the other one grazing his upper right arm. Fandom dropped the snow in pain and pulled his left hand over the burning graze. As he fell to the ground, the bounty hunter stood up again, and walked towards Saidgge, trampling over Fandom in the process. He then pointed the two blasters at Saidgge. “Now, if you tell me why you are here, I might just let you live.” Saidgge spat at the bounty hunter’s face, who smacked Saidgge’s cheekbone with his left-hand blaster, forcing the Sith to fall to the ground. PEW! The bounty hunter shot a blast that thinly missed Saidgge’s left ear. “Just tell me, and you’ll survive.” “What about my apprentice?” “That bastard? Well, if you tell me why you’re here, he may live too.” Saidgge thought deeply. If he told the truth, his plan would be foiled. If he lied, the bounty hunter would kill him and Fandom. He decided to tell what he thought was a good lie. “I came here to eliminate you. Jabba was in no need of your assistance anymore He chose Boba Fett to take your place.” “LIAR!” The bounty hunter pounded his foot into Darth Saidgge’s chest. “You came here for the weapons master, did you not? Either way, you will be terminated before you can go any further on your mission.” The bounty hunter reached for Saidgge’s neck and picked him up. “This is your end.” Then, he threw him off the cliff before him.

Who is this so-called “weapons master?” Does he have anything to do with the mission at hand? What will happen to Fandom now that Saidgge has been killed? If you are really keen to know, then don’t forget to be here tomorrow for Part 10 of Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! If you want to check out the full story so far, you can explore my Star Wars Zone (find it via the “Stories” page below the blog’s title and slogan), and you’ll probably find the story there. Well that’s a wrap for today on THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM!

Tuesday, December 17, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 8


A night’s rest in an unknown cave that ends with a new enemy approaching from the shadows. Who is he? If you want to know the answer to this question, you will have to read the 8th instalment to Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! Just to catch you up, here’s what happened in yesterday’s episode:

FANDOM:       How is it day already?
SAIDGGE:      To be honest, science here is strange.
FANDOM:       Well we better get going, right.
FANDOM:       Oh my, the sun’s already gone.
SAIDGGE:      Something’s here. I sense it in the Force.
UNKNOWN:   You’ve interfered with my business for too long now.

Now, if you like what you just read, how about you read the 8th part:

Unknown Location, Polle I, 17 BBY

   “Who are you?” Darth Fandom’s eyes stared suspiciously into the large figure’s gun barrel. The certain blaster rifle that this opponent of them held was identified by Fandom as an HR-98 Combat Assault Rifle. He had heard about it when he found Darth Saidgge on the Imperial Capital of Coruscant. These HR-98 rifles were commonly used in the criminal underworld of Coruscant, and have been extremely useful all of their users. It is rumoured that Kelic, the so-called Mentor of the Bounty Hunters, used to smuggle these HR-98 rifles to various crime families across the galaxy, before he got the job of training the various bounty hunters that were in need of proper training. Something was strange about this HR-98 rifle, though. There were various extended pieces to it, but these pieces could only be accessed by a certain number of bounty hunters. “Well, judging by the fact that you inspected this rifle so carefully, I think you know who I am.” Darth Fandom took one step back. “Who is employing you?” The supposed bounty hunter smiled sarcastically, still holding the rifle in perfect position. “I guess there’s no harm in telling you, since you’re going to die anyway. I’m employed by the great and almighty Jabba the Hutt, and you’ve intercepted too much of his operation already.” Fandom turned to face his master, Saidgge, who was looking down at the ground. “Why didn’t you tell me any of this was happening?” “I was afraid you might not come if you knew the truth.” Fandom twisted his head around angrily, and faced his bounty hunting opponent. “I’ve dealt with bounty hunters before, so I assume you’ll be the next on my kill list.” The young Sith grabbed his lightsaber and flicked the switch to turn it on. “I’m sorry, kid, but in North Polle, there isn’t any sun—” Suddenly, Fandom’s red lightsaber froze up. “—so your puny little lightsaber won’t work on me.” Absolutely shocked, the Sith apprentice’s jaw lowered as he stared horrifically at his lightsaber. When he looked up again, he dropped his lightsaber, and spoke to his newly found enemy, “Alright then, my lightsaber doesn’t work, so I guess we’ll just have fight a different way.”

What is the mission that Jabba the Hutt has sent this strange bounty hunter on? Who will win in the battle that will follow? What will happen next? If you are in need to know, then don’t forget to be here tomorrow for Part 9 of Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! If you want to check out the full story so far, you can explore my Star Wars Zone (find it via the “Stories” page below the blog’s title and slogan), and you’ll probably find the story there. Well that’s a wrap for today on THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM!

Monday, December 16, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 7


A quiet night in a distant cave, safe from a raging genocidal wampa. Or is it? If you want to know the answer to this question, you will have to read the 7th instalment to Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! Just to catch you up, here’s what happened in yesterday’s episode:

SAIDGGE:      We’ll have to settle here tonight.
FANDOM:       It’s night already?
SAIDGGE:      To you want to fake your death someday?
FANDOM:       Precisely.
FANDOM:       If we didn’t have our Force powers, we’d be dead?
SAIDGGE:      No, we just wouldn’t be here right now.

Now, if you like what you just read, how about you read the 7th part:

Unknown Cave, Polle I, 17 BBY

   “Master....?” Darth Fandom rose from a pile of rocks, which he had seemingly fell asleep on over the dark night. “What are you doing?” Saidgge stared into the midnight sky, no feelings or movement. “I have been protecting you.” Fandom laughed quietly to himself. “What, from the creepy monsters that might rip off my precious head?” Saidgge tilted his head towards his apprentice, Darth Fandom. “Precisely that, my young Sith apprentice. We have already seen an abused wampa trying to kill us and a haunted forest, so what might come next?” Fandom thought. “Another figure of your imagination?” Darth Saidgge thought deeply in his head. “Well, I’m quite sure that I’m not just imagining all of these things.... especially since you’ve seen all of these as well.” Fandom glanced up at the roofing rocks that sheltered the two Dark Side of the Force-using Sith (soon to be) Lords. “I wonder when day is going to come.” Saidgge stared one last time outside of the rocks. “Day is year.” As he spoke these words, the cold sun of Polle I rose out of the shadows and into sight of anything on the planet. “How is it day already?” Fandom asked his Sith Master anxiously. “It’s rather strange, to be honest, although science here is strange altogether. There is only one sun in the Polle System, but for some reason, it always passes Polle I very quickly. That is the reason that the only warmth on this planet is in the early morning, now.” “Then how is it light for the rest of the day?” “That question, I cannot answer.” After hearing this, Darth Fandom stood up straight. “Well we better get going before the sun goes, right?” “Of course.” Darth Saidgge stepped out first. He had to squeeze tightly through the tiny opening in order to actually get out. Afterwards, Darth Fandom crawled out. He found it quite easy to get out due to his slim body and excellent physique. As they stepped out, the sun began to fall. “Oh my,” Fandom mumbled, “the sun’s already gone.” They walked and walked, until suddenly, Saidgge stopped, followed by Fandom. “Something’s here.” “You’re damn right something’s here.” The two turned around to face a tall man in an over-sized fur coat, pointing a large blaster rifle at the two Sith. “I’m sorry, but you’ve interfered with my business for too long now.”

Who is this mysterious man that has been lurking in the shadows? What business have Saidgge and Fandom interfered with? What is Saidgge’s actual mission? If you are in need to know, then don’t forget to be here tomorrow for Part 8 of Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! If you want to check out the full story so far, you can explore my Star Wars Zone (find it via the “Stories” page below the blog’s title and slogan), and you’ll probably find the story there. Well that’s a wrap for today on THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM!

Sunday, December 15, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 6


The two main characters have escaped from the forest, but what happens now? In order to know the answer to this question, you will have to read the 6th instalment to Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! Just to catch you up, here’s what happened in yesterday’s episode:

FANDOM:       Come on, I’ve got to find a way out.
VADER:          I have been expecting you, young one.
QERIX:           The Master arrives.
FANDOM:       I thought I was dead?
SAIDGGE:      Just an illusion.
UNKNOWN:   I’ve got you now.

Now, if you like what you just read, how about you read the 6th part:

Unknown Location, Polle I, 17 BBY

   “We’ll have to settle here tonight.” The journey had already been too tough. Now, night set upon the freezing cold ice planet of Polle I, and it was time to rest until the morning came to the planet. Fandom gazed at the sky for a short moment. “It’s night already? How is that possible?” “We’ve been here for a long time already. Don’t be surprised.” In front of them was a dark cave, shielded by a large amount of rocks with only a small opening in the front of the shelter. Darth Fandom lowered his jaw in horror. “We-We-We-We’re going to have to sleep in there?” Saidgge rolled his eyes and looked at his apprentice. “You think you can survive without taking risks?” “Yes,” Fandom answered sarcastically. Saidgge wrapped his left arm around his apprentice’s neck. Fandom easily pulled it off as fast as he could. “So are we going to go in or what, my Master?” Saidgge smiled. “I think we probably should.” “Okay, as long as you tell me about how the hell I survived the wrath of the undead trees.” “Of course, my young apprentice.” Saidgge bent down on his knees and crawled into the cave, then became hesitant and didn’t say a word. Worried to death, Fandom whispered, “Is everything okay and safe down there, Master?” Saidgge lifted his hand and alerted his apprentice with a hand signal that notified Fandom that it was safe. Fandom then mimicked his master’s previous movements into the cave, and then leaped in. “Alright then, now that we’re both in, it’s time that you explained what happened in the forest.” “Why are you so keen to know what happened? To play your death in a fake way some day?” “Precisely.” Saidgge shook his head. “The same thing happened to me back there. It was an illusion trying to play with our minds. We were simply invulnerable to it because of our amazing Force powers.” “Are you telling me that if we didn’t have Force powers, we’d be dead and buried in those branches by now?” “Well, if we didn’t have Force powers, then we wouldn’t be here right now.” Saidgge peeped outside of the cave and glanced quickly at the sky. “Okay, we’ve got a big day ahead of us, so we better get some sleep.” Then there was silence.

Where is the character that was lurking in the shadows? If you are curious to know, then don’t forget to be here tomorrow for Part 7 of Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! If you want to check out the full story so far, you can explore my Star Wars Zone (find it via the “Stories” page below the blog’s title and slogan), and you’ll probably find the story there. Well that’s a wrap for today on THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM!

Saturday, December 14, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 5


The adventure continues.... Although Friday the 13th is over, it doesn’t mean that spooks won’t continue! For today is the day for the 5th instalment to Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! Just to catch you up, here’s what happened in yesterday’s episode:


SAIDGGE:      I’m not sure how we’re going to make it out of this.
FANDOM:       Come on, what better way to die.
SAIDGGE:      How in the name of Darth Bane himself are you here?
PSEYTH:        I wouldn’t use the name of Bane in such a way.
SAIDGGE:      How the hell are you talking to me?
PSEYTH:        And now is time for the experience.

Now, if you like what you just read, how about you read the 5th part:

Unknown Forest, Polle I, 17 BBY

   “Come on, I’ve got to find a way out.” The now-bruised Sith apprentice Darth Fandom, who had just strangely been shot across an unknown forest by what appeared to be a living but dead tree branch, attempted to run his way out of the awkward labyrinth. “At least before my Master does.” While sprinting across the field, Fandom pulled his speed down all the way and halted himself. In front of him, he saw the Dark Lord of the Sith, Darth Vader. “I have been expecting you, young one. You will pay for your insolence.” Fandom reached for his right hip, but found nothing there, not even his red-bladed Sith lightsaber that he carries everywhere. “You came unprepared. You do not even carry a weapon.” Fandom scratched his head, not understanding the current situation. “I know that this isn’t real. You aren’t here. This forest is just tampering with my mind, and I can prove it.” He placed his two hands together in the shape of a sphere and shot a Force ball at his opponent, Vader. The Master Sith simply deflected the blast with his lightsaber, which hit Fandom in the chest. This, surprisingly, actually forced Fandom down onto the ground. “If I were you right now, I would be crying for my Master.” Vader then swung his saber around and pointed the tip of the blade at Darth Fandom’s throat. “Prepare to die.” Vader pulled back his lightsaber, about to chop Fandom’s neck off, when suddenly, Vader was sliced in half by another red lightsaber. “The Master arrives.” Fandom gazed at the man in awe and wonder. “Qerix?” The man pulled an ugly face. “That’s Master Qerix to you. You’re coming with me.” Fandom shook his head. “This is impossible. I won’t come.” “You asked for it.” Qerix then killed Darth Fandom. “Whoa!” The seemingly dead Fandom opened his eyes.  “Hello, apprentice.” “Master Saidgge.... I thought I was dead?” “Just an illusion. Now come on, we need to get moving.” Fandom smiled. “Hey, there’s no rush. Can you just tell me what happened?” Saidgge sighed. “It’s complicated. I’m really not sure what the purpose of the illusions were, but now we have to get going.” “Fine. I’ll go.” As the two walked in the snow, a man lay down his binoculars a short distance away. “I’ve got you now.”

Who is that lurking in the shadows? If you are curious to know, then don’t forget to be here tomorrow for Part 6 of Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! If you want to check out the full story so far, you can explore my Star Wars Zone (find it via the “Stories” page below the blog’s title and slogan), and you’ll probably find the story there. Well that’s a wrap for today on THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM!

Friday, December 13, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 4


The time has come.... Friday the 13th is upon us! As well as this, it’s also upon Darth Saidgge and his apprentice Darth Fandom in this new instalment to Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas! Just to catch you up, here’s what happened in yesterday’s episode:

FANDOM:  You should have told me this place would be cold!
SAIDGGE: Are you sure I didn’t warn you about this?
SAIDGGE: There’s an enemy approaching.
FANDOM:  W-W-W-Wampa....
SAIDGGE: Quickly, follow me.
FANDOM:  Oh, I have a bad feeling about this....

Now, if you like what you just read, how about you read the 4th part:

Unknown Location, Polle I, 17 BBY

  “I hate to say this,” Darth Saidgge murmured quietly to his young and sprouting Sith companion, “but I’m not sure how we’re going to make it out of this one.” The two of them stared stiffly and directly at the ferocious and deadly looking forest before the both of them. Although it seemed like an incredibly suicidal choice to make, the only other path available to take was the path that led to the revenge-hungry wampa that awaited the perfect lunch. With fear one of the only thoughts stuck in his crooked mind at this point, Fandom answered coldly to the previous statement, “Come on, what better way to die than be executed by perfectly harmless trees that have been dead for hundreds of years.” Disappointed by the comment on the current situation, Saidgge continued, “Okay, okay, then you go step first into the great unknown.” “With pleasure,” Fandom replied. Incautiously, the Sith apprentice walked a few steps, but was then pulled into the forest by one of the vines. Screaming, Saidgge pulled out his handy blaster rifle, but was whacked in the face by another rogue branch and pulled into the natural apparition’s hands. After a rather long amount of time being swung around by the forest’s apparently undead branches, the pair was randomly dropped in different locations of the forest. Feeling that he had broken basically every single bone in his body, Darth Saidgge forced himself up with his two bare hands and began to tread his way through the seemingly haunted forest’s pathway. While walking, he heard many voices speaking to him, many unbeknownst to him. All of a sudden, the Sith Lord Pseyth appeared, in the flesh, out of his Sith Holocron. “How in the name of Darth Bane himself are you here?” The ancient Sith smiled happily and deviously. “If I were you, I wouldn’t use the name of Bane in such a way. It couldn’t turn out in a way that well in your favour.” Saidgge thought to himself that this was impossible, that none of this could be more than zero percent real. “How the hell are you talking to me right here?” “Don’t worry; you aren’t imagining any of this. Not even your death.” In a split-second, Pseyth Force-pulled Saidgge’s lightsaber and held it between his two hands. “And now is time for the experience.” In one strike, Darth Saidgge fell to his death on the ground below him.

How was that? Well, now I’ve left a cliff-hanger, and hopefully also a reminder that Part 5 is going to be here tomorrow! If you want to check out the full story so far, you can explore my Star Wars Zone (find it via the “Stories” page below the blog’s title and slogan), and you’ll probably find the story there. Well that’s a wrap of THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM!

Thursday, December 12, 2019

Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 3

Darth Fandom is back! Today is a special day, for today is.... Star Wars: Chronicles of Christmas Part 3! Like yesterday's section of this story, here's a basic plot of what happened yesterday, written as a movie script:

SAIDGGE: Alright then, go freeze yourself to death outside.
SAIDGGE: Now is the not the time to rest.
FANDOM:  I'll go on one condition.
SAIDGGE: You don't need to know the answer, youngling.
FANDOM:  Did you just call me youngling?
SAIDGGE: Right, how about we go then?

And here's the main story:

Unknown Location, Polle I, 17 BBY

   “You should have told me that this place would be so cold!” The youthful Darth Fandom rapidly rushed his two black-gloved hands together, attempting to warm himself up as much as possible, but failing miserably. “Are you sure,” his Sith Master, Darth Saidgge, replied, “that I didn’t warn you before we left that this journey would be awkwardly cold?” “No,” the apprentice answered, “I do not recall at all.” “Then there is nothing I can do about it.” Fandom angrily spat onto the ice-covered ground. “We’ve been walking for miles now. Isn’t there some sort of civilisation here that can provide us with something?” Suddenly, Darth Saidgge stopped walking and forced Fandom to do the same. “There’s an enemy approaching.” “I thought we were the ene—” Fandom’s sentence was halted when the ground shook terrifically. Out of the cold mist before the two Sith, a giant furry creature appeared. Silently lifting his left arm towards the animal, Fandom muttered under his breath, “W-W-W-Wampa....” As it approached its two foes, the wampa threw its two enormous arms towards the pair, barely missing. This wampa, however, was like know other Hoth-based carnivore that anyone had ever seen. A variety of large bruises and scars were visible across the beast’s torso, from head to toe. Along with this, its right eye was blood red, almost as if it had just pulled a large sharpened dagger out from its eye, and also a twisted right horn that appeared to have been shaped around a long wooden log. It was obvious that this deformed wampa had been tormented and abused by somebody, but that didn’t change the fact that it almost killed two men. Noticing this fact, Darth Saidgge pulled out the DC-14 blaster rifle that he had taken from his Lambda-class shuttle (in truth, the shuttle had actually sunken into the cold ice after Fandom and Saidgge departed from it, with all of the various items inside), aimed it at the wampa’s one shoulder, and fired. The burning blast sunk into the creature as it roared horrifically in pain. During this period, Darth Saidgge called his apprentice, “Quickly, follow me!” Unaware of what just happened, Fandom followed his master with intrigue, “Oh, I have a bad feeling about this....”

Well, please be here tomorrow, for tomorrow's part will be spooktacular.... As Friday the 13th approaches, fasten your seatbelts for the next part: The Ferocious Forest of Evil Spirits! In this breathtaking fourth installment to the epic Star Wars take on the tale of Christmas, Darth Saidgge and Darth Fandom must encounter the spectres of the past.... and the future! Be here for it, and don't be anywhere else, other than THE SITH ARCHIVES OF DARTH FANDOM! (DISCLAIMER: You can be somewhere else, I'd just much rather appreciate it if somebody was viewing this story....)